Why Do We Lie?

Everyone lies! Those who disagree are lying right now.

The different lies we tell:

1) Ones that make us feel better (Doesn’t matter that he never ever introduces me to any of his friends or talk about me, its true love!) (*nudges Sam san* doesn’t matter that you have to give him a month to bring himself to say, “I love you”, its true love!)

2) Ones that make others feel better ("No baby, he wasn’t a patch on you. You're the best I've ever had!" / "I'm a virgin, you're my first!")

3) Ones that cover our tracks ("Must be the virus floating around, I can’t make it to work. *cough cough*")

4) Ones that cover other people's tracks ("Yes aunty, we are in Kodai right now but X is in the loo, will ask her to call you asap!" *frantic dialing of X's number to inform her that mommy suspects something*) (X is with your BF.)

5) Ones that make us look good ("I've read ‘Ulysses’, I think no one uses the stream of consciousness technique better than Joyce.")

6) Ones that make others look good ("Fao San is a caring and loving individual!") (What the…! Sam san got stoned and threw up on the lawns of the Leela Palace Kempinski.)

7) Ones that are harmless ("I've read ‘Ulysses’.) (Substitute with ‘Atlas Shrugged’.)

8) Ones that are vicious ("Fao San is a caring and loving individual!") (Sam san’s father broke his leg dancing in a temple.)

9) Ones that get us sex ("I'm in a place in my life right now where I want to have fun and explore my sexuality!"/ "I love being with a woman, so sensuous and erotic the female body is!" Both work only for girls, btw) (Gasp! You didn’t mean it then?)

10) Ones we tell to pass the time (man landing on the moon!)

11) Ones we tell out of necessity ("size doesn’t matter!")

12) Ones we tell at work ("the report will be on your desk before COB.")

13) Ones we tell at home ("I haven’t met the right person yet." *boink boink boink*)

14) Ones we tell friends ("I know what I'm doing.") (Friends always see through this one.)

15) Ones we tell ourselves ("I do know what I'm doing and I'll be fine!") (Sam san NEVER sees through this one.)